Forge Forward

I hate that term.

Forge forward.

I have heard it all my life and it is the bane of my exisitence.

Ok, maybe that’s a bit dramatic, but I’m a Leo, we tend to weigh on the dramatic side.

When you are a bit stuck in your life, having people tell you to “forge forward” or “move on” is just insulting.

BUT….

Let me tell you why.

When you encounter someone stuck, they are REALLY stuck.

Telling them, in anyway shape or form, to move on, invalidates them and their feelings, because anyone who is stuck….wait for it…is really STUCK!

I know I am being a bit redundant, but I want to drive home a point about moving forward.

Trust me, if they could move forward, they would.

No one wants to be stuck and invalidating their feelings makes them sink even further.

You may have wonderful intentions, but it doesn’t help, it makes things worse.

So what should you do?

That is the question.

Listen.

As much as you can.

As much as your life will allow, because it takes a great deal of time to get unstuck.

It may be too much for you to handle, in which case, I suggest very gently asking the “stuck person” if there is way you can support them as they move through what it is that seems to be stagnating them. I.E. counselling, or perhaps just reading a book that may help you help them.

If you feel you do not have the patience for this, then politely say so.

Please do not have a mental time frame for a friend or loved one to “get better” that they are not aware of.

Don’t get me wrong, I am aware that everyone has there own life and responsibilities.

But maybe think to yourself, if this person was suffering from a life threatening illness (which I can assure you depression is) would you perhaps have a wee bit more patience? A bit more to give?

Really think about that before you forge forward.

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About Bee

I am a mom. I have suffered through boughts of depression, anxiety and PTSD. I have a great husband who I adore and who continually supports me. I love people and animals. I devour non fiction books. I am a foodie and I love to cook but have screwed up every one of Paula Deans dishes I have tried to make. I am now convinced it is she who can’t cook. I make my own butter and cheese but I never make my bed. I have an odd habit of speaking with a "Shrek" accent to make people laugh. I LOVE to make people laugh. I love little children. I am afraid of swings and can’t watch my own or anybody elses child…well…swing. I am convinced I have a touch of ADD because I always click on the “link” in an article which means I have read the beginning of thousands of articles but have never finished them, usually because I can’t find them again. I always wear lipstick.
This entry was posted in anxiety, depression, motherhood, parenting, Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

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